What I'm looking for

I have my husband and my kids, and the gospel of Jesus Christ. That's pretty much what I've found in life that I'm looking for. That makes me happy.

But I keep looking around, looking for more. Since being abandoned by my family of birth, I keep looking around. I'm not sure why. I find it unsettling. However, I have revisited some old friendships that have been really very heartwarming and sweet, and I'm really grateful for them. I had let myself become cynical about people, thinking nobody wanted me, that I was undesirable and ugly. My family made me feel that way. They had beat me down until I was certain I had no worth to speak of. When I was sure I had no value, I tried to end my life, thinking my own children would be better off without me.

What a fool I was!

I have so much more to do! I have so many more mountains to climb, so many more sunsets to see, so much more of everything . . . I still haven't found what I'm looking for.